Mixing Oil and Water [Erik + Jin]

Erik shook his head. "Nothing, I was just... I mean... your eyes. They're so different."

Then, he flinched. Oh, he knew exactly what Jin would say in response. How it was all Erik's fault, how Erik had no one else to blame but himself, how Erik was too late in getting upset, how dare Erik get upset over something that he caused, etc. It wasn't all that difficult to guess what Jin might say. Because of that, he prepared himself for a barrage of verbal--and possibly even physical--abuses flung at him.

"Well duh, red and gold are like, kinda on totally opposite ends of the 'weird eye colour' spectrum," Jin huffed, turning away with a slight blush. Why wasn't he tearing Erik's wings off right now? ...Well, maybe because he didn't feel like it. Or maybe that stupid breathing exercise worked better without ash and embers floating in the air. Arthur would be so disappointed in him...but he wasn't here, so meh. Jin would do what he liked...and if that involved continuing a conversation with the ultimate source of his misery, then so be it. He was a total rebel like that. ...Or something.

"But like...I know what you mean. I guess it's probably because I've seen more than you," he said simply, sounding neither bitter nor angry. "All the greatest tragedies of the world; we were there fucking around before you lot even caught wind that something might've been up. I may not have been around humans as much as you, but that doesn't mean I don't know anything about what makes them tick," Jin smiled coldly. "It takes a lot less to make them hurt than it does to heal."

Erik studied Jin once more before turning away and sighing sadly. "I see," he mumbled under his breath, and then turning away to go back to the bathroom. Although he had known that Jin had become a demon, now that he saw what Jin looked like... he could feel his heart slipping down into his toes, making his feet feel heavy. He shuffled, not really bothering to pick up his feet more than that.

Look what I've done! He thought to himself. Oh, he knew that excessive guilt was a bad thing. In fact, he had been reprimanded for it countless times, and had been punished under the "failure to forgive" clause, and yet, he still couldn't let the guilt go. It was as if the more he felt guilty, the more he messed things up, and the more his messing up of things made him feel guilty again. It was a never-ending cycle of shame. And now, he could feel the guilt washing over him like flood waters rising so high so quickly that he couldn't even hope to reach the surface.

Jin had no idea why, but he didn’t want to see Erik leave; it almost felt like he was falling all over again. They had left on awful terms, but before that, they were really... No, that couldn't be it; it was probably because he'd never witnessed so much emotional pain from an angel. It was like seeing something forbidden...

“You know, for an angel, you like, run away a lot,” he said, leaning against the hallway wall. “Aren’t you like, supposed to be smiting me or something? I know you’re stronger than I am, and I know I can’t heal as fast as you. So what’s stopping you from like...”

The demon mimicked taking a bullet to the head, complete with sound effect.

Erik stopped shuffling and turned around. "I don't really want to... you know..." he mimicked Jin's gesture before continuing. "I mean, we used to be so close, you know? And I can't exactly pretend like it was all your fault that you wound up in Hell. Not to mention that... I mean... " he shrugged and stared at the carpet, noticing that he would have to get it cleaned. "Not to mention that out of all the demons, you're probably the one that I don't want to face. We used to be such friends. I don't understand what caused you to have such a change of heart right before the battle. The last time we talked, right before the battle, we were in the fields talking about how much we loved each other, and creation, and God, etc. I just... clearly, you were lying. I should be mad at you for that, and yet, I can't, because what I did in pushing you was worse. So... all I can really do is run away, I guess." Erik bit his lip and rubbed his arm, still looking down at the ground.

Jin bit his lip to stop himself from screaming in frustration, though that probably wasn’t the smartest idea for someone with fangs to do.

“I wasn’t lying, you were lying,” he said quietly, insulted that Erik would even try to press any of the blame on him. “Or did you conveniently forget what you told me before? After all that lovey-dovey bull you spewed in the fields?”

Of course he remembered how close they used to be; if he hadn’t, why would he have been so upset? Enough to swtich sides? Unconditional love, that’s what Lucifer had promised. He was an idiot back then for believing such a thing was possible, but he knew better now. People only loved you when you did something for them...you had to work for it. Frankly he didn’t really think it was worth all the effort.

Erik frowned. What else had he said that day? He racked his brain trying to figure out what exactly he had said that had infuriated Jin so much, but he couldn't think of anything. He shook his head and sighed. "I don't know what you're talking about, Jin. I must have conveniently forgotten, because... I just don't remember." He placed his face in his hands and made a noise in the back of his throat. Today was already long and frustrating enough, and now, he couldn't remember a key piece of the events that happened before Jin fell? Great, just great.

Jin chewed on his lip for a while longer before he realized that it was bleeding. It hurt that Erik would actually forget what was arguably the reason he had fell. Regardless of being pushed – he would have never joined the rebellion if Erik had never admitted to hating him. What confused him was why the angel was being so apologetic now.

“...If you don’t remember then I won’t bother reminding you,” he muttered, wiping the blood from his lip with a shrug. “It’s not like you can do anything to change it anyway; it is what it is.”

It wasn’t so bad. He had gotten used to it. It was his life now. He wouldn’t know what to do if he didn’t have it. It was fact. It was his purpose now.

"I don't get it," he said suddenly, looking up with hurt eyes. "I really liked you, you know? Like, really. And you just-!"

Jin broke off with a sigh before slumping back onto the wall.

"Forget it. I'm hungry."

Erik frowned. "I just what? Jin, I really liked you, too! You were my favorite person in Heaven, a part from God, of course. I never understood what changed. I mean, nothing changed on my end. Did something happen to you in the meantime? I just... I never understood..."

Upon seeing that Jin's mouth was bleeding, Erik took a tissue from a nearby tissue box and held it up to Jin's bleeding lip, hoping to stop the bleeding. He knew that it was a long shot that Jin would ever let Erik take care of him, but frankly, it was in Erik's nature to help.

“I said forget it,” Jin repeated, his temper flaring. “If you ‘don’t know’, then you don’t know. There’s like, no point in telling you because it wouldn’t change anything.”

He eyed the tissue warily. Why was Erik being so nice? This was all just a trick so he’d let his guard down, wasn’t it? Fat chance – he wasn’t about to let that happen again. Fool me once, shame on me; fool me twice shame on...wait, how did that go again? Fool me once, shame on...ugh, whatever, it didn't really make sense anyway.

"Leave it," he insisted, wiping the blood off with another shrug. "It'll close up on its own; besides, it hurts when angels touch me. Side effect."

Erik looked at the blood on the tissue before throwing it away. It was dark red, darker than human or angel blood. He had half a mind to keep it, but he figured that that would be creepy. "I'm sorry... I just... I don't understand." After throwing away the tissue, he rubbed his arm, and then turned around to go back to the bathroom to continue to clean it.

“What the hell is so hard for you to understand?” Jin asked, losing patience. “...You know what, nevermind, I don’t care.”

Angels could be so damn dense sometimes. But what did it matter? He was fucked, Erik was saved, and that’s how it would always be. Jin drew a hand over his mouth and brushed off the last of the blood, wiping it off on his jeans before walking into the kitchen in search of something sweet.